Dear Doctor, Apart from Ravel’s Bolero, what’s on your seduction playlist?
Let’s get this straight, the first stage of any seduction is the compatibility test. No developing relationship should face the kind of pressure of being played out to a smiley-face rave soundtrack, so beloved of today’s fortysomethings as they make the rookie error of revisiting their blissed-out, welcoming-the-sunrise youth. Nor is it about requesting a list of your potential partner-to-be’s favourite songs – who knows what they’ll come up with? Asking what music someone is “into” can make or break the moment, and if it goes wrong, it will never lead to… Now where were we? Once the lights are low, the Dr would suggest a small dose of Beethoven’s Late Quartets, the favourite recording being by Quartetto Italiano, to coax some intelligent conversation. If this works, we know they have taste and active brain cells, and then the action should begin.
If rhythm is what you’re after, try Harry J Allstars’ Liquidator. For staying power, I’d go for Acid, by Ray Barretto. If you’re feeling optimistic, line up The Paragons’ Riding On A High And Windy Day. As the temperature rises, we head for musical bliss: Louis Armstrong’s Stardust, since Armstrong is always the sound of lurve.
If, after all this, your subtle hints aren’t registering, take down that dusty ukulele from the wall (every house now has one, and I guarantee 99% are unplayed) and get the singalong started. At this point, it’s going to have to be Show Me The Way To Go Home – time to admit defeat. And there’s no shame in that: the Dr always recommends at least eight hours’ sleep a day. It’s cheaper than Botox.
• What musical advice do you need? Post your questions in the thread below
