Frock? Check. Speech? Check. Tablecloth? Check. There's a mere five hours to go until red carpet coverage of the 86th Academy Awards starts, and seven until the ceremony. So you should be fully primped and primed for this year's Oscars.
If not, we can help: below is a comprehensive reading list of articles to get you up to speed, plus latest predictions on who'll win the awards.
There is also an invite. We'd like you spend the night with us, following along with - and contributing to - our non-stop coverage of the 86th Oscars from 10pm GMT (5pm EST, 2pm PST). Here's a brief schedule of the night, in case we can tempt you into accepting.
Schedule
Ploughing through the reading list below may well take you through to 10:30pm GMT (5:30pm EST, 2:30pm PST), when our liveblog will launch. Your host for the evening will be a man who now rivals Jack Nicholson in his association with rocking up for the Oscars in shades and a grin, hitting on the winners and looking fantastic throughout. Xan Brooks will be blogging until the morning comes (whichever side of the Atlantic you're on) with special guests:
• Hadley Freeman, who is actually at the Oscars, or rather, backstage, in the press area. Still - exciting, eh!
• Jess Carter-Morley, Imogen Fox and Rosie Swash, who'll be commenting on the fashion faux-pas, when Xan feels he's too ill-equipped to do so, as well as running separate fashion coverage.
• You. On Twitter, on Facebook, on Instagram, on whatever. We want you to tell us how you're watching the Oscars, and what you think of the ceremony - and the results. Tweet @guardianfilm and email adam.boult@theguardian.com
• Stuart Heritage. Who will be attempting our drinking game, in the office, and hoping a minimal amount of people namecheck Meryl Streep.
• Twitter itself: we'll be working in the choicest tweets, from all over the world.
• Gifs! This year, we're making it move.
Once the ceremony has wrapped, at around 4am GMT (11pm EST, 8pm PST), we'll also have:
• Peter Bradshaw's reaction
• A Guardian Film Show special edition
• News
• Galleries
• Blogs
• Comment
• A very whizzy interactive
• And much more …
Your reading list
Hopefully you're now excited. So here's some recent content from the site to read now in order to be up to speed later:
• The drinking game … you may need to get shopping
• How to quickly catch up with the nominated films
• Xan Brooks suggests 10 things to look out for at tonight's ceremony
• Mark Kermode files a wishlist of what he'd like to happen
• Guardian film pundits on what they think will win, should win and should have been nominated
• David Cox on whether only a Brit really could have made 12 Years a Slave
• Peter Bradshaw travels back in time to pick the best Oscar moments ever
• The interactive team on how this awards season has stacked up so far
• A video breaking down the Oscars in numbers
• Interviews with Mr Oscars, Harvey Weinstein, best supporting actor nominee Barkhad Abdi, best supporting actress nominee June Squibb and top make-up lady Charlotte Tilbury.
• Hadley Freeman's diary from LA on how predictions - just like the ones below - have killed the Oscars
• Tom Shone's final tips
• A Guardian Film Show Oscars preview
• Stuart Heritage's alternative Oscars
• A news piece on how many of the best picture nominees have bombed at the box office
• A profile of best actor frontrunner Matthew McConaughey
• Hadley's series of video interviews from Hollywood reporting on the buildup to the awards
• Our series of Oscar hustings in which one of us cheerleads for one of the best picture nominees
• For the nostalgics: a gallery how how things used to be
• A quiz in which we invite you to guess the acceptance speech from the Wordle - answers to be announced at the start of the liveblog
• A profile of tonight's host, Ellen DeGeneres
Final predictions
Hollywood was all a-flurry yesterday, when top Oscar pundit Scott Feinberg retracted his best supporting actress prediction, swapping J-Law for Lupita. We've been team Lupita for ever and we're sticking with that; we're also viewing last night's Independent Spirit Awards very much as a dry run for tonight. Here - titles bolded up - are our final predictions:
Best picture
12 Years a Slave
American Hustle
Captain Phillips
Dallas Buyers Club
Gravity
Her
Nebraska
Philomena
The Wolf of Wall Street
Best director
David O Russell, American Hustle
Alfonso Cuarón, Gravity
Alexander Payne, Nebraska
Steve McQueen, 12 Years a Slave
Martin Scorsese, The Wolf of Wall Street
Best actor
Christian Bale, American Hustle
Bruce Dern, Nebraska
Leonardo DiCaprio, The Wolf of Wall Street
Chiwetel Ejiofor, 12 Years a Slave
Matthew McConaughey, Dallas Buyers Club
Best actress
Amy Adams, American Hustle
Cate Blanchett, Blue Jasmine
Sandra Bullock, Gravity
Judi Dench, Philomena
Meryl Streep, August: Osage County
Best supporting actor
Barkhad Abdi, Captain Phillips
Bradley Cooper, American Hustle
Michael Fassbender, 12 Years a Slave
Jonah Hill, The Wolf of Wall Street
Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club
Best supporting actress
Sally Hawkins, Blue Jasmine
Jennifer Lawrence, American Hustle
Lupita Nyong'o, 12 Years a Slave
Julia Roberts, August: Osage County
June Squibb, Nebraska
Best original screenplay
American Hustle
Blue Jasmine
Dallas Buyers Club
Her
Nebraska
Best adapted screenplay
Before Midnight
Captain Phillips
Philomena
12 Years a Slave
The Wolf of Wall Street
Best foreign film
Broken Circle Breakdown (Belgium)
The Great Beauty (Italy)
The Hunt (Denmark)
The Missing Picture (Cambodia)
Omar (Palestine)
Best documentary
The Act of Killing
Cutie and the Boxer
Dirty Wars
The Square
20 Feet from Stardom
Best animation
The Croods
Despicable Me 2
Ernest and Celestine
Frozen
The Wind Rises
Best original song
Alone Yet Not Alone, Alone Yet Not Alone [disqualified]
Happy, Despicable Me 2
Let It Go, Frozen
The Moon Song, Her
Ordinary Love, Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom
Best cinematography
The Grandmaster
Gravity
Inside Llewyn Davis
Nebraska
Prisoners
Best editing
American Hustle
Captain Phillips
Dallas Buyers Club
Gravity
12 Years a Slave
Best sound editing
All Is Lost
Captain Phillips
Gravity
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
Lone Survivor
Best sound mixing
Captain Phillips
Gravity
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
Inside Llewyn Davis
Lone Survivor
Best make up and hair
Dallas Buyers Club
Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa
The Lone Ranger
Best original score
The Book Thief
Gravity
Her
Philomena
Saving Mr Banks
Best production design
American Hustle
Gravity
The Great Gatsby
Her
12 Years a Slave
Best visual effects
Gravity
The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
Iron Man 3
The Lone Ranger
Star Trek Into Darkness
Best costume design
American Hustle
The Grandmaster
The Great Gatsby
The Invisible Woman
12 Years a Slave
