Pass notes No 3,032: Peta

The animal rights group plans to launch a vegan porn site

Age: 31.

Appearance: Naked, airbrushed, glowering at a wind machine.

This will be the glamour model Peta Todd, presumably? Presumably but wrongly. This is Peta the animal rights group. The two are easily confused.

I would have thought that lobbying against vivisection and showing your breasts to a photographer were, in many ways, quite different. How charmingly naive of you. In fact, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals are famous for putting their point across through the medium of mild sexual arousal.

How so? Young women in their pants preparing to enjoy intimacy with a pumpkin. That was a commercial that Peta was banned from airing during the Superbowl two years ago.

Sorry, did you say a pumpkin? Yes, among other ingredients. It's a light-hearted way of illustrating their claim that "vegetarians have better sex".

That hardly seems likely if they're reduced to shagging vegetables. "Vegetarians are lonely and deranged," perhaps. There's also their "I'd rather go naked than wear fur" campaign.

An improbable dilemma, if the truth be told. Yes. But a nudity-justifying one.

Are celebrities involved? They are. Khloe Kardashian, Eva Mendes, Christy Turlington.

Mendes looks like she'd rather go naked than do most things. I won't comment on that. Anyway, it has now emerged that Peta plans to launch its own vegan porn site.

"Vegan porn"? Is that videos of vegans having sex? Or just porn without the cream and butter? At this stage, that isn't clear. All we know is that it will include enough adult content to qualify for the peta.xxx domain, combined with enough graphic footage of animal cruelty to qualify as vegan activism.

Lovely. "It's the kind of thing you often won't see on TV," says a Peta spokesperson.

Largely because I wouldn't watch it. Quite.

Do say: "Click here for explicit vegan-on-vegan action."

Don't say: "What about the ethical treatment of vegetables?"

• This article was amended on 25 August 2011 to correct the Pass notes number in the sequence.

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