Quiz question: who was the first female US president? There hasn’t been one? No, this is a quiz in the future, so there has. Elizabeth Warren? Michelle Obama? Hillary Clinton? Catherine Cortez Masto, maybe? No, no, no and no. The correct answer is … Ivanka Trump!
“Not impossible” is the conclusion Matt Frei reaches in Ivanka Trump: America’s Real First Lady? (Channel 4). “Stranger things have happened.”
First, though, we get a little Ivanka refresher. Like Mum Ivana, she did some modelling before joining the family business and rising to becoming executive vice-president and, everyone agrees, Daddy’s favourite. She was with him on his famous TV show, too. Today, she is assistant to the president. Assistant, possibly apprentice, now that the presidency is something between a family business and a gameshow.
Those Donald-Ivanka clips are not just peak weird-Trump, they’re some of the creepiest television ever, aren’t they? What do the two of them have in common, they are asked. “Real estate and golf,” she says. “Well, I was going to say sex,” says Donald. (What does he even mean?) And: “I’ve said that if Ivanka weren’t my daughter perhaps I’d be dating her.”
She laughs. Instead of shouting: “Dad! No! That is so inappropriate!”, which would be a better response. Or, as he seems to suggest that he has said it before, calling 911. Frei is not really helping by asking if she is “simply a fig leaf for her father’s policies” – now I’ve got a picture of Donald, nude, orange all over, with his “policies” covered by his daughter. Eurgh, God, I’m sorry.
Frei has assembled a reasonable bunch: writers and journalists, academics, a psychologist, a rabbi, neighbours, fundraisers for, campaigners against, antis and pros. They say that Ivanka embodies the conflict of interest that poisons this administration, she’s being used as a tool to whitewash his behaviour, she’s his best weapon, he couldn’t have been elected without her, she softens the edges, her conversion to Judaism in order to marry Jared Kushner shows dedication, she’s beautiful, successful, graceful, a champion of women, LGBT rights and climate change, even …
Actually, she gets a reasonably easy ride. So, for example, we see the look of surprise on Christine Lagarde’s face, surprise perhaps that Ivanka is on a panel with her and Angela Merkel at a women’s summit. But we don’t hear the jeers from the audience as Ivanka defends her father’s treatment of women. And I wanted more – some serious (psycho)analysis – on The Weirdness, the odd father-daughter relationship and her apparent acceptance of it. And the thing he does when he introduces her to a rally crowd: “I’m sure most of you have never heard of her,” and: “Has anyone heard of Ivanka Trump?” What’s that about?
What about the actual first lady, Melania? Invisible. “She seems to have gone into a witness protection programme,” say Frei. Or to Guantánamo, maybe? The colour of her jumpsuit a cruel reminder of her husband’s face …
Anyway, this isn’t about her, it’s about Ivanka. A Princeton prof, Julian Zelizer, makes most sense; he says her influence is significant “because we have a president who doesn’t know what he is supposed to do”. And then, on the possibility of an Ivanka presidency: “We have to imagine everyone can run for presidency at this point.”
So, in the photo of her with her father and Canadian prime minister Justin Trudeau in the Oval Office, her in the president’s chair, is she trying it out for size? “Don’t laugh,” says Frei. “America loves a dynasty.”
Why stop there, then? Back to the quiz. A bit trickier this time: the second female US president? Arabella Rose Kushner, daughter of “Javanka”? Good guess, but unfortunately Arabella didn’t have the right surname, the one emblazoned on the White House (we’re in the future, remember). The correct answer is in fact Chloe Sophia Trump, daughter of Donald Jr.
So (returning to the present), Chloe may not yet have reached the age of three, but word is she is already showing excellent leadership qualities, as well as being very pretty and graceful. No official role yet, although she is beginning to sit in on the meetings. The Middle East is an area of particular interest, apparently. About which Grandad holds her opinion in high regard. Exciting times.
