Summer: Earth's Seasonal Secrets review – a cute, cuddly hour of absolute cliches

Watching wildebeest, zebras, bears and penguins doing what we’ve seen them doing countless times before was 60 minutes of your life you will never get back

“Autumn is just round the corner, so you’d better make the best of the good times while they are here,” says narrator Andrew Scott at the close of Summer: Earth’s Seasonal Secrets (BBC 1). Advice that will have come an hour too late for many viewers who would have been far better off going outdoors to catch the dying summer’s warmth than cooped up indoors.

It’s one of television’s not particularly well-kept seasonal secrets that the Friday night of the August bank holiday is pretty much a dead zone; only the very lonely or the very bored will be watching, so there is no point in the broadcasters scheduling anything for which they want to grab good ratings. It is a time to fill the airwaves with soothing televisual Mogadon: a time for undemanding repeats. Or better still, new programmes that feel like repeats.

Summer: Earth’s Seasonal Secrets was every nature programme you have ever seen, condensed into 60 minutes of your life you will never get back. It was as if some unlucky editor had been told to dig out every cliche in the BBC’s natural history archive and cut and paste them into a summer-themed special that went big on the cute and cuddly and kept the red in tooth and claw to a minimum.

We started with a bear getting honey from an old tree trunk. Which was nice. We then saw some North American pika wandering around with flowers in their hair. They were so sweet, they were given their own hillbilly soundtrack. Which was also nice. And so on around the world in stunning time-lapse and slow-motion photography, interspersed with shots of the sun rising, the sun being very hot and the sun setting.

Wildebeest, zebras, lemurs, butterflies, ibex, crabs, lions, penguins – penguins are always good box office – albatrosses and sharks all got their few minutes in the sun. Most of them did a lazy, almost apologetic bow to the camera at the end of their turns as if to to say, “have you really not seen me do this before?”, though I did wonder what the male turtles were doing while the females were making their 1,500 mile schlep to lay their eggs. Watching this, I suppose.

Contributor

John Crace

The GuardianTramp

Related Content

Article image
Hotel Armadillo review – Attenborough checks in to an amazing animal AirBnB
David Attenborough narrates a fascinating detective story about the hunt for the rare armour-plated kittens who hold the key to Brazil’s fragile ecosystem

Tim Dowling

08, Apr, 2017 @6:00 AM

TV review: Attenborough's Ark – Natural World Special

And David Attenborough did make a TV show according unto all that the LORD (and the BBC) commanded him, writes Sam Wollaston

Sam Wollaston

10, Nov, 2012 @8:00 AM

Article image
Meerkats: Secrets of an Animal Superstar – review
Were certain advertisers misguided in choosing cuddly meerkats as their mascots? Didn't they know they were child killers, asks Sam Wollaston

Sam Wollaston

12, Oct, 2013 @6:00 AM

Article image
King of the swingers: what Primates tells us about our locked-down world
From the orangutans that lived undisturbed for 700,000 years to the frolicking rhesus macaques of Kathmandu, the BBC’s new nature blockbuster brings us closer than ever to the planet of the apes

Stuart Jeffries

22, Apr, 2020 @5:00 AM

Article image
Highlands: Scotland's Wild Heart review – majestic osprey, cute deer … but no Nessie
This wildlife doc, with a soulful voiceover by Ewan McGregor, travels across some of the most remote parts of the UK – in all their violence and gorgeousness

Lucy Mangan

06, Aug, 2016 @5:00 AM

Article image
Ancient Mysteries: Eden Revealed review – all round Adam and Eve's for a gazelle feast?
Excavations in Turkey reveal tantalising details about humankind’s great leap forward to hunter-gathering, and the role religion played in that shift

Lucy Mangan

25, Nov, 2017 @6:45 AM

Article image
Travel Man: 48 Hours in … Rome review – a gentle mini-break for the mind
Richard Ayoade takes Matt Lucas on a surreal whistlestop tour through the byways and white-knuckle highways of Rome

Lucy Mangan

21, Oct, 2017 @5:30 AM

Article image
Gregory Porter’s Popular Voices review – glorious survey of powerful pipes
From Prince and Whitney Houston to Mahalia Jackson, the first episode of the jazz star’s three-part series is a languid, loving celebration of vocal showstoppers

Lucy Mangan

18, Nov, 2017 @6:00 AM

Article image
'I was peeing and a polar bear popped up!' Secrets of Seven Worlds, One Planet
Shooting poachers, circling polar bears, flailing four-tonne seals, singing rhinos and the world’s roughest sea … the team behind Attenborough’s latest extravaganza relive their thrills and spills

Interviews by Kate Abbott

26, Nov, 2019 @3:03 PM

Article image
Killer Whales: Beneath the Surface – TV review
Sam Wollaston learns that killer whales, though hungry and ruthless terrorisers of sea lions, have family values too

Sam Wollaston

26, Oct, 2013 @4:59 AM