Peter Robinson reviews the latest music releases

Camille | Five O'Clock Heroes Feat Agyness Deyn | The Courteeners | Buy Now | Billiam

Pick of the week: Camille, Money Note (Charisma)

In the rapidly expanding new genre of extremely fashionable international warbling pop ladies who look as if they'd punch your lights out as soon as sing you a lovely song Camille's had her chances - she was signed years ago and has been on people's lips longer than chapstick - but this release of Money Note is an incredible and deranged blast of summer. This tale of Camille's plans to sing like Mariah Carey comes across like a mix of Grace Jones and Feist; it's funny, addictive and just unquestionably, relentlessly and dizzyingly incredible, vaulting itself so far ahead of the rest of this week's single releases that it's halfway into Wednesday's TV listings.

Five O'Clock Heroes Feat Agyness Deyn, Who (Glaze)

Two points of note here: 1) Some things in pop are supposed to be brilliant but turn out to be so bad that you wish they'd make sound illegal, while some things in pop are supposed to be chronic but turn out to be not quite so bad that you'd throw a CD out of the window. This falls into the latter camp, although Deyn's surprisingly competent and likable vocal turn does make the best of what is quite a mediocre song. 2) Agyness should join Girls Aloud as Cheryl's stand-in while Tweedy/Cole is busy telling hapless twats they have "really made the song their own" and "given it 110%" on The X Factor this autumn.

The Courteeners, No You Didn't, No You Don't (Polydor)

The Courteeners really are the sound, look and stench of lumpen indie in its death throes. The lack of imagination in every element of this charmless, sad and miserable excuse for "exciting new music" is breathtaking. This is a song so musically unambitious that you can picture with depressing ease the sight of the band coming offstage at any one of the numerous Carling Academy venues in which they're doomed to spend the next three years, feeling like they've "made it" and that this is "what it's all about". The fact that for many bands this really is what it's all about just adds to the tragedy of it all.

Buy Now, Bodycrash (Positiva)

Ingredients: robot voice going "futuristic sound futuristic sound futurustifutisi" a lot, spangly stupid electronic sounds something like Justice having a nervous breakdown, completely incongruous Let's All Chant sample. Result: amazing.

Billiam, My Generation (Nightingale)

Billiam, as classy and as subtle as orgy night in the Big Brother house, are the worst boyband of all time. You could replace every one of your vital organs with mechanical pumps and switches, spend each day in an oxygen tent and sign a deal with the Devil extending your time on earth for another 8,000 years and life would still be too short to spend even one solitary second listening to the output of this offensively clapped-out attempt to revive the boyband formula. This supposed "youth anthem" is about as likely to mobilise the country's teenage population as a saucepan sale at Robert Dyas.


Peter Robinson

The GuardianTramp

Related Content

Peter Robinson's new releases review: July 28

Robyn | Beyoncé | Lil Mama | Josh Wink | Amerie

Peter Robinson

27, Jul, 2007 @11:13 PM

John Robinson reviews the latest music releases

Primal Scream | Natty | Linkin Park | Hot Chip | The Feeling

John Robinson

04, Jul, 2008 @11:11 PM

John Robinson's new releases review

Radiohead, Jigsaw (Falling Into Place) | Supergrass, Diamond Hoo Ha Man | Kanye West, Flashing Lights | Jay Sean, Ride It | Sons And Daughters, Darling

John Robinson

12, Jan, 2008 @11:59 PM

Peter Robinson's new releases review

Sam Sparro, Black & Gold | Soulja Boy, Yahhh! | Clocks, Old Valve Radio | Jordin Sparks, Tattoo | Scouting For Girls, Heartbeat

Peter Robinson

29, Mar, 2008 @12:22 AM

Peter Robinson reviews the latest music releases

The Yeah You's | Cartridge | Jonas Brothers | Katy Perry | Mika

Peter Robinson

05, Jun, 2009 @11:01 PM

Peter Robinson reviews the latest music releases

The Golden Filter | Britney Spears | Miley Cyrus | Attic Lights | U2

Peter Robinson

14, Feb, 2009 @12:01 AM

Peter Robinson reviews the latest music releases

Frankmusic | Will Young | Christian Falk feat Robyn | Smae Difference | Take That | The Pogues And Kirsty MacColl

Peter Robinson

22, Nov, 2008 @12:01 AM

Peter Robinson reviews the latest music releases

Japanese Popstars; Rihanna; Sportsday Megaphone; Avenue; Oasis

Peter Robinson

19, Sep, 2008 @11:01 PM

Mike Sterry's new releases review: July 21

Groove Armada Ft Mutya Buena | Dragonette | Shirley Bassey | Alterkicks | The Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster

Mike Sterry

20, Jul, 2007 @11:20 PM

Jude Rogers' new releases review

MIA: Jimmy | Ed Harcourt: You Put A Spell On Me | The Coral: Jacqueline | Paul McCartney: Ever Present Past | Sugababes: About You Now | Samanda (The Twins): Barbie Girl

Jude Rogers

28, Sep, 2007 @11:00 PM