Charlie Countryman review – ‘arthouse solemnity meets strident facetiousness’

In this ugly American-in-peril fantasy, Shia LaBeouf plays a man whose dead mother (Melissa Leo) appears to him and recommends he visit Bucharest (Aubrey Plaza shows up just long enough to ask: “You’re sure you don’t mean Budapest?”) Once there, Charlie falls for a cello-playing, sharp-shooting femme fatale (Evan Rachel Wood), and falls foul of her brutal ex, a hoodlum of dubious provenance and even more dubious accent, played by Mads Mikkelsen, and named Nigel. A hoodlum named Nigel. A Nigel played by Mads Mikkelsen. That’s how ill-conceived this laborious venture is, veering between arthouse solemnity and strident facetiousness. As for Shia, he’s wildly self-indulgent and narcissistic: all puppy eyes, emoting and angsting like there’s no tomorrow. He just doesn’t know when eneouf is eneouf.